I like to think I don’t believe in the god named Scarcity, but the last few days have reminded me that my subtle allegiances to Scarcity are surprisingly strongly-held.
Scarcity peaks around a corner when all the wrong lights flash on my car’s dashboard (you know those lights – the ones you have to flip through your manual to find out what they mean and they say “stop driving your car right now and take your car to the dealership,” even if you’re not sure how to get to the dealership if you stop driving your car).
The whisper of Scarcity is heard when bills (even expected bills) all show up on the same day.
Scarcity doesn’t strictly operate in cash but shows up in the deluge of meeting requests, pressing deadlines, and wasted minutes or hours of a long commute.
Scarcity laughs at the seemingly-endless buzzing drone of notifications, pop-up reminders, and unread messages in your email inbox.
Scarcity says the water is rising and you’ll never find dry land again.
Scarcity’s song’s melody begins with “There is not enough. You do not have enough.” and rises to the refrain of “You are not enough. You will never be enough.”
Scarcity invites me to surrender to fear, to give up, to prey on myself and others.
I rarely, if ever, have strong, mountaintop, “Come to Scarcity” moments.
But the draw, allure, and movements of Scarcity are more subtle than that.
Some days I actually do believe in this god I don’t believe in.