Whether it is fate or luck, I always happen to enter the grocery checkout line behind one of the following people:
(1) The .5% of the population who still uses a personal check to buy their groceries. The least you could do is have your checkbook ready instead of fishing around in your Hermione Granger purse for it. Also, please remember that you need a pen to write a check, and it would save us all some time if you clipped your pen to your checkbook so you only have to go fishing in your purse one time.
(2) The person who does not have their “club card” and enters 10-15 different phone numbers to try to get the 30-cent discount on the bag of chips you probably should not have bought. Eventually, you will either sign up for a new card or ask the cashier to swipe the one-everyone-knows-you-hide-next-to-the-register, so please just do this before trying to enter all those phone numbers. NOTE: this is usually me.
(3) The person who enters the checkout line and then sends their kids to get last-minute items you “forgot.” You are not fooling anyone; we all know that you got into line early to save time and are now wasting my time while you stall the cashier. On the plus side, at least your kids are getting exercise. However, you should know the only thing your kid hates more than being sent to get groceries while you stand in line is when you make them stand in line while you get the last-minute groceries, leaving your kid with angry and impatient people behind them in line with no way to pay for all those groceries.
During my lunch break today, I went over to the
neighborhood chain bulk/discount/warehouse store. I needed to get (1) two-pack of flavorless Soy Milk and (2) one-gallon jugs of apple juice (for apple cider – yum!). Today, armed with two gallons of apple juice and two gallons of soy milk, I got in line…behind a woman whose cart was overflowing with candy. Bags and bags and bags and bags of candy. Despite the incredible speed of the cashier, it took forever for her to check out with all that processed sugar.
The grand total? $330 worth of candy.
It took me 10 minutes of waiting for all that candy to move from her cart to the conveyor to the cashier to the craplastic bag back to the cart (and then to her car).
Next time, please let me skip in front of you to buy my three items.